Oilfield Joke: Oil and Gas Operator Seeks Advice

The oil and gas operator was in a big financial trouble...  He had bought and contracted several thousand acres of minerals thinking that the area was the next big play, and instead, it was a bust.  It was so bad he was even contemplating becoming a roughneck again.

  As a last resort, he went to see a priest and poured out his story of tears and woe.

When he finished, the priest said, "Here's what I want you to do... Put a beach chair and a Bible in your car and drive up in the mountains to the lake. Take the chair and the Bible to the water's edge, sit down in the chair, and put the Bible in your lap. Open the Bible... The wind will rifle the pages, but finally the open Bible will come to rest on a page. Look down at the page and read the first thing you see. That will be your answer... That will tell you what to do."

A year later the oil and gas operator was back to see the priest. The operator was driving a new Lincoln and wearing a pair of high-dollar boots and an expensive felt hat. The operator pulled an envelope stuffed with money out of his pocket and gave it to the priest as a donation in thanks for the advice.

The priest recognized the benefactor, and was curious. "You did as I suggested?" he asked.

"Absolutely," replied the oil and gas operator.

"You went to the lake?"

"Absolutely."

"You sat in a beach chair with the Bible on your lap?"

"Absolutely."

"You let the pages rifle until they stopped?"

"Absolutely."

"And what were the first words you saw?"

"Chapter 11."