Oilfield Joke: A Tourist Walks into a Pet Store....

A tourist walked into a pet store and was looking at the animals on display. While he was there, a petroleum engineer from a nearby office walked in and said to the storekeeper, "I'll take a rig hand monkey please." 

The storekeeper nodded, went to the side of the store, and took out a monkey. He put a collar and leash on the animal and handed it to the engineer, saying, "That'll be $2000." The man paid and left with the monkey." 

The surprised tourist went to the storekeeper and said, "That was a very expensive monkey. Most monkeys are only a few hundred dollars. Why did that one cost so much?" The storekeeper answered, "Ah, that's a rig monkey. He can rig up, plan rig moves, rewind motors, tail pipe, paint, pull maintenance, all with no back talk or complaints. It's well worth the money." 

The tourist then spotted a monkey in another cage. "That one's even more expensive!! $10,000 !! What does it do??" he asked. "Oh, that one" replied the storekeeper. " That's a Rig Manager monkey. It can instruct at levels of maintenance, run the safety program, deal with clients, and even do some paper work. A very useful monkey indeed." 

The tourist looked around a little longer and found a third monkey in a cage. The price tag was $50,000. The shocked tourist exclaimed, "This one costs more than all the others put together !!. What in the world can it do??". "Actually," said the shopkeeper, "I've never really seen him do anything but drink beer and whiskey and make a lot of noise, but his papers say he's a Company Man."

Oilfield Appreciation Sporting Clay Shooters, Sponsors and Volunteers, the next event is at Dallas Gun Club on Friday July 29th,  

sponsored by

__________________________________________________

• July 29th, 2016 – 5th Annual NORTH TEXAS SPORTING CLAY CLASSIC at the Dallas Gun Club in Lewisville, Texas.

>>Brochure<< 

>>Online Registration<<

___________________________________________________

• September 9th, 2016 – 5th Annual PERMIAN BASIN SPORTING CLAY CLASSIC at Jake’s Clays in Midland, Texas.

>>Brochure<< 

>>Online Registration<<

___________________________________________________

• December  9th, 2016 – 4th Annual LAST BLAST SPORTING CLAY CLASSIC at Westside Sporting Grounds in Katy, Texas.

 >>Brochure<<  

 >>Online Registration<< 

___________________________________________________

For more information about Oilfield Appreciation Event Sponsorship and Registrations. Please Contact the Event Coordinator at

Info@OilfieldAppreciation.com or by phone at 800-277-1647

We appreciate our past sponsors

Oilfield Joke: Retired Drillers like to gamble....

John Sam and Abe, 3 retired Drillers, would get together every night, rain or shine, to play poker. 

It was a nice way to pass the time and the men enjoyed it immensely. 

John’s wife wasn’t so fond of her husband’s poker playing.

She thought it was a dirty and low way to fill his time, but she had long ago resigned herself to her sorry fate,

although inside of her, there was  always a low flame on the back burner waiting to erupt.

One Wednesday night, after a few nights of boring games, something exciting happened.

 

Sam watched in amusement as John and Abe, each convinced that they had the better hand, 

 

slowly put their life savings into the pot. 

Things started to get really intense when John, running out of available cash, added  his car and house into the pot. 

When there was no money left to bet on they each showed their cards. 

As soon as John saw Abe’s cards and realized he had lost, he had a heart attack and died. 

“Sam,” asked Abe “how are we going to tell his wife?” 

“Don’t worry I’ll take care of it” Abe replied. Abe knocked on John’s door. 

“John just lost all of your life savings in a poker game,” said Sam when the door was opened.

 

“He’s afraid to come home.” John’s wife was fuming “HE DID WHAT?!” She screamed.

 

“TELL HIM I DON’T WANT TO EVER SEE HIS FACE AGAIN! TELL HIM TO JUST DROP DEAD!”

“Ok,” said Sam nodding his head, “I’ll tell him just that!”

We Want You! 

The Oilfield Appreciation North Texas Sporting Clay Classic will be here before you know it!

Do Not Let this Opportunity Slip Away!

• July 29th, 2016 – 5th Annual NORTH TEXAS SPORTING CLAY CLASSIC at the Dallas Gun Club in Lewisville, Texas.

>>Brochure<< 

>>Online Registration<<

___________________________________________________

• September 9th, 2016 – 5th Annual PERMIAN BASIN SPORTING CLAY CLASSIC at Jake’s Clays in Midland, Texas.

>>Brochure<< 

>>Online Registration<<

___________________________________________________

• December  9th, 2016 – 4th Annual LAST BLAST SPORTING CLAY CLASSIC at Westside Sporting Grounds in Katy, Texas.

 >>Brochure<<  

 >>Online Registration<< 

___________________________________________________

For more information about Oilfield Appreciation Event Sponsorship and Registrations. Please Contact the Event Coordinator at

Info@OilfieldAppreciation.com or by phone at 800-277-1647

We appreciate our past sponsors

Oilfield Joke: Why does work have to be that way?....

The busy and over stressed CEO of a large Oil and Gas company was walking from the parking area of a new drilling location along with two of his engineers.

While walking along the gravel road they discovered and odd shaped bottle in the grass near by,

When they opened the cork top, a genie appeared and asked them if they would like to each make a wish.

The first engineer said, “Heck yeah, I wish I was on a beach on a tropical island!” Immediately his wish was granted.

The next engineer proclaimed, “Awesome, I wish I was on my hunting lease in South Texas!” and boom....Immediately his wish too, was granted.

Being that it was now his turn to make a wish the CEO exclaimed “I want the two of them back in their offices right after lunch!”

That is the way it goes in the Oil Patch.

We Want You! 

The Oilfield Appreciation North Texas Sporting Clay Classic will be here before you know it!

Do Not Let this Opportunity Slip Away!

• July 29th, 2016 – 5th Annual NORTH TEXAS SPORTING CLAY CLASSIC at the Dallas Gun Club in Lewisville, Texas.

>>Brochure<< 

>>Online Registration<<

___________________________________________________

• September 9th, 2016 – 5th Annual PERMIAN BASIN SPORTING CLAY CLASSIC at Jake’s Clays in Midland, Texas.

>>Brochure<< 

>>Online Registration<<

___________________________________________________

• December  9th, 2016 – 4th Annual LAST BLAST SPORTING CLAY CLASSIC at Westside Sporting Grounds in Katy, Texas.

 >>Brochure<<  

 >>Online Registration<< 

___________________________________________________

For more information about Oilfield Appreciation Event Sponsorship and Registrations. Please Contact the Event Coordinator at

Info@OilfieldAppreciation.com or by phone at 800-277-1647

We appreciate our past sponsors